Monday Mash- Week 13

Welcome back to the blog. I must say, this was one of the more relaxing weeks of watching football. The Jets were not in action, so no pressure there. But it's not on the same level as a simple bye week. Sure, there is no pressure of losing during the bye. But there's also nothing to gain from it (excluding rest, preparation, etc.) But I was able to sit back on Sunday knowing that the Jets had already won! So after that Thursday night win in Buffaronto, Jets fans could sit back and, well, hope for some help.

And yet again, the Jets got some help. The past few weeks, there has been one or two "sneaky upsets" that are doing nothing except keeping the Gang Green heart beating. Yesterday featured the sneakiest of all, with Oakland taking down Pittsburgh in their own building (much more on that in a bit.) The Dolphins also let the football world know the AFC East race is a long way from the checkered line, as they beat the Pats in one of the most topsy-turvy-games of '09. Finally, the Colts knocked the Titans out of the race while staying undefeated.

While there was much help, there were also a few big (plural of the noun-form of hinder.) The two wild card leaders took care of business, with Jacksonville eeking by Houston and Denver exploding Kansas City. So the playoffs are still a long-shot for the Jets. But they're still a shot. They need more of the same help they've gotten. I'm not going to go through the billions of scenarios, but Yahoo has this cool playoff generator thing that you can play around with and make your own scenario.

As for the Giants, they helped themselves in an enormous way yesterday. If you saw yesterday's pick section, you'll know it's something I didn't see coming. At all. It was for a little while, as Dallas jumped out early. But the Giants seemed to score 2 touchdowns in 4 seconds before the first half ended. A big plays (including Hixon's punt return) later, the Giants are alive and kicking for the wild card and even the division.

One of the teams in the Giants' way would be the Green Bay Packers, who play Baltimore tonight. One thing for sure is that one New York team is going to be very happy tonight. Either Green Bay loses and the Giants celebrate, or Baltimore loses and the Jets go bonkers. We will get to that pick later on in the usual spot. But you probably shouldn't trust the pick very much after yesterday's performance. It seemed like a pretty good balance...4 favorites, 2 underdogs. But that balance kinda goes out of whack when all six teams are on the road. The Cowboys, Texans, and Vikings all let down bigtime, while Denver easily covered. The Bucs couldn't pull the Perfiction upset, but there was still an enormous moral victory to be had from the section. Here's an excerpt from the Rams-Bears pick...

"Just begging for a cover here. I'm not making this the Upset Perfiction of the Week, because the spirit of that honor is that the underdog is supposed to win outright. The Rams have burned me too many times to count. Maybe they come through for once."

St. Louis was given 9 points. The final score? 17-9 Bears! Boom, baby. One of the biggest moral victories in the months-long history of the picks section.

Here's the rest from week 13...

The Montauk BeverageWorks Delicious Performance of the Week:
Bruce Gradkowski, Raiders. We never thought we would see the day. A man in the silver and black has a day so epic, perhaps so absurd, he is distinguished with this honor. I've said all along that this award isn't all about the numbers, and sure enough, Bruce's 308 passing yards ranked just 9th in the league for week 13. But come on. The Raiders beating an absolutely desperate Steeler team? On the road?? NEEDING TO GO THE LENGTH OF THE FIELD IN THE FINAL MINUTE??? Just look at these highlights. Please, just pay attention to the Raider announcers' voices as they call that final drive. Even they couldn't believe what they were seeing. Gradkowski completed ridiculous passes to non-fictional NFL players that are named 'Chaz' and 'Johnnie Lee.' Sure, Bruce and the Raiders got bonus points for helping out the Jets. But this game, and his performance, was amazingly preposterous. Or better yet, preposterously amazing.

• Officially speaking, we know have 2 teams that have clinched the playoffs in the NFL. Though it was a long time coming, the undefeated Saints and Colts both punched their tickets. The Colts win was impressive, coming against the powder-blue-hot Titans. The Saints? Well, they got an early Christmas gift from the Redskins. Washington had dozens of chances to put that game away. But at the end of the day, both streaks live on.
• Minnesota is also a lock to clinch, but that was a particularly disturbing loss to Arizona last night. Sure, the Cardinals will always be dangerous. But the Vikings got some injuries they didn't need, and Favre looked a little 'Jet-like' with the ball. Everyone is entitled to a bad week. But the cloud of doubt about Favre seems to be forming overhead.
• I'm never betting for or against the Texans again this season. This is getting insane. I know Jacksonville would be a playoff team if the season ended today, but what was Houston doing?? They play every game as if they are 7-8 and it's the final game of the year. It never means anything to them. If that coaching staff stays intact into next year...I don't know. I would give up.
• The Bengals beating the Lions didn't shock too many people. But the headline on ESPN is a little rough on Cinci's fans..."Bengals handle Lions, clinch rare winning record." Is a backhand required with everything the Bengals do right? Their fans deserve this success.
• I was a little creeped out by the Eagles-Falcons situation. Michael Vick comes back to Atlanta, and shows ability that we hadn't seen since his return. Not only do the Falcon fans have to see that, but they also must watch their golden boy Matt Ryan injured on the sidelines as their season melts away. Seems like a particularly harsh day.
• I was thrilled that the Dolphins-Patriots game was on New York television. It was a thrilling game. But watching the Patriots for an entire game made me realize that Wes Welker is very often-overlooked in the discussion of athletes that look like sure pedophiles.
• Yes, the Broncos shut me up for at least this week. 44 points is a lot. And so is an 8-4 record. But road games against Indy and Philly will tell me a lot more than games against the Chiefs.
• As we said earlier, it's the Green Bay Packers hosting the Baltimore Ravens on Monday night football. I've just done some extensive weather research, it's supposed to be 25 degrees with flurries. My green heart is with the Packers, and so is Vegas with a 3.5 point spread. But Baltimore's defense comes in angry and makes some plays. Big plays. Ravens 24, Packers 22